The Story of "US"...A modern day Cinderella story

John 8:7(b) Jesus said to them, "Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her."

It was about 19 years ago when my life had spiraled completely out of control and I had walked far away from God. At that time, My (now) husband, Larry and I had been dating for 4 years. Though I grew up in church...I had walked away from God completely during my first marriage. Most of you have read my story about being raped at 13, that act and my family life, threw me into making a lot of bad/wrong decisions with looking for "love" in all the wrong places. My first husband and I had both destroyed our first marriage with infidelity and I was struggling with the fact that Larry was living in Pennsylvania, 800 miles away and at this point he was liking the bachelor life so much that he didn't want to get married again. The original plan was that he would live in PA for 1 year and then I would move up there and we would get married, but I never had the heart to move my son away from his dad so I didn't move up there. Larry and I flew back and forth every other weekend to see each other but it was still REALLY tough.

Many of my bad decisions have not only been without God but have also been with the help of alcohol. The company I worked for at the time (19yrs ago), would shut down for 3 days each June and have a party...a party at the bar on the first floor of the building we worked at, a party at a local bar down the street, a party at a farm that the owner of our company owned...mix alcohol and loneliness and you have a good idea of my 3 days of partying it up. I do not judge you if you drink but it destroyed my childhood and almost destroyed my adulthood...I pray I never touch a drop for the rest of my life.

The company would fly in all the sales guys from around the US for those 3 days. The first night on the dance floor I danced with a guy whom at the time, I didn't know was married with 3 kids. By the second day, we had stayed the night together. I had not been on birth control but he had assumed that I was...weeks later, I had discovered I was pregnant.

Larry had flown in to visit for the 4th of July and I told him I was pregnant...in that moment in time...I was so scared but he held me, told me he loved me and then asked me to take him to the airport...he left.

When Larry got back to PA, he called and said that our relationship was over - I told him that our relationship didn't start over the phone and it sure wasn't ending over the phone...though we talked much less and our every other weekend visits turned into every other month visits...he was still there for me as a friend.

The guy that got me pregnant had now told his wife and they agreed it would be best for me to have an abortion. Their idea was for him to fly back to St. Louis (he lived in NJ) and go with me to get the abortion. He would arrange it all, come with me and pay for it all. The husband and wife pressuring me to get an abortion was weighing heavy on me and I was very distraught. I left work early one day because I was so sick over the whole ordeal...I felt that having an abortion was wrong and I didn't believe it was the right thing for me to do but I was a single mom who had just bought a house...I didn't see how I was going to provide for my son and this new baby. Thanks to God and a great friend (Marie...I'm forever grateful!), I had just started going back to church. When I left work I decided to go to the church to see if anyone was there that I could talk to. By the grace of God, the Pastor was there. It's amazing because it was a Wednesday and his office hours were only until 2 on Wednesdays and it was after 3 but he was still there...Thank you Jesus!!! I told him all about what had happened, he made it clear that he did not judge me but that he believed abortion was wrong, he explained why and prayed with me and let me know that the church would stand with me in whatever decision I made.

It was an EXTREMELY rough time but I decided to NOT get an abortion...however, I was still questioning God concerning everything. I finally asked God that if He was real, to reveal Himself to me in 3 specific ways...He did each of the 3 things that I had asked and I knew that I knew there was a God.

After I had my daughter in February 2000, I was in the hospital and was holding her...I asked God, "How can you bless me with this beautiful life after all that I've done?" His reply was almost audible and He said to me, "Because I love you, now go and sin no more." ~ Job 33:16 "He speaks in their ears and frightens them with warnings to turn them away from doing wrong." I knew He was calling me out of that perpetual lifestyle of sin that I had accepted so easily. I was not a slave to a wicked step mother like Cinderella but I was a slave to my own fleshly desires of sin. I knew at that very moment I was to lay that life down and accept the only Love that could ever carry me through. The love of my heavenly Father. Though I had grown up in church...I had never been taught that Christianity is more than just going to church...it's about a relationship with Jesus Christ.

My daughters dad requested paternity testing and it proved that he was her dad.

Larry had never really been to church and didn't really know if he believed there was a God but he had started going to church with me when he was back here in St. Louis. Sometime around June of 2000 he had given his life to the Lord and felt that God was calling him to move back to St. Louis to marry me. So in August of 2000 he quit his job in PA and moved back here to St. Louis...in November he asked me to marry him. We were married March 6, 2001 and we began proceedings for Larry to adopt my daughter. Her father gave up his rights and Larry adopted her that year.

I have been FOREVER grateful that I did not abort her. She is a miracle in my life!!! She is very smart and funny and brings such joy to our lives. I know that God has a plan and a purpose for her life and wouldn't know WHAT I would do without her here...I know that she was born "for such a time as this."

It's not been easy but our soon to be 15 years of marriage is proof that God is merciful and gracious. I feel like we have the modern day Hosea & Gomer story from the book of Hosea in the Bible. I thank God for the prince that he brought to me who has loved me through it all...even when I didn't know how to love and forgive myself. What a blessing it is to be married to my best friend! Thank you God for rescuing me!!!

Here we are on the day of our wedding, March 6 2001, on Shoy's Beach in St. Croix, USVI with my parents, and my children, Michael and Heather.

The grace of God and His goodness has been so evident in my life!!! I haven't always done everything right but that's where God's grace shines...He is FOR you...He's NOT against you! If you have had an abortion...we extend God's love, mercy and grace to you...I pray that you will find God's love and forgiveness and will forgive yourself. I pray that God calls you to Himself and that you would submit yourself and your life to Him.

I'm putting my past in the hands of my Redeeming God and trusting Him with the outcome of it!!! Thanks Christine Caine for posting this last week...it speaks volumes to me!

"For I know the thoughts that I think towards you," says the Lord, "Thoughts and plans of good, for Hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11